I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
