so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Randomize
