Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize