I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
