i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
