If that was your dad, he is hot
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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