Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
