so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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