do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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