So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
