So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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