I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
