whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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