im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize