Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
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