If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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