just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
