After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
