Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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