Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
