He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize