its not stalking. its research.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He kissed a someone with a penis
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Are we still banned from the library?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
