She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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