So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
