Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
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