I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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