you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
