Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
