Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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