Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
