Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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