you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
