if you like me you must not know who I am
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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