he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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