you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize
