It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
