She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
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