I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
