He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
