guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
