Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
our cab driver is having phone sex.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
