It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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