is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
