my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize