wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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