Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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