remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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