Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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