Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Randomize
