Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
